Endings Are Beginnings More Often Than Not
by PriyaLaLita
Summary: because life is funny that way. Sometimes, the happiness of others can just be awful when you're miserable. But it's times like those when you need to create some of your own joy. JJ/Drake. because everything can use a part 2...UPDATED
1. The Lighter Side of Things

**Endings Are Beginnings, More Often Than Not (because life is funny that way). **

_By: PriyaLalita_

The ceremony was small, and intimate, yet fancy. It was final. Rings had been passed, vows exchanged, frosting from the cake dabbed on each other's noses. There was an air of finality to the day. Nothing would be the same, it seemed, though it was a foolish thought, really. Everything_ had _changed, but much before just today. They had _been_ changed for over 2 years now. JJ knew it, but, admitting it seemed to be a whole other story indeed. It wasn't as if he had hard feelings. In fact, he wasn't sure if he felt anything at all.

A certain kind of numbness had overcome him for the day, sitting in the back of the church. He was never one for churches. They always made him feel awkward, and vaguely ignorant. (_When to stand, when to sit, what to say and do…? He'd grown up worshipping the Hollywood sign after all.)_ He sat as far away from everyone as possible, but close enough as to not be rude, feeling like an intruder in this happy occasion. He already felt like everyone was staring at him, waiting for him to jump up screaming his objections.

He wasn't that crass. His battle was over. Ryo had won. He accepted that. He, in fact, welcomed his defeat with open arms. What was a life pining after a hopeless love anyway? It was no way to live his life, certainly. He could do better; he could get anyone he wanted. However, he found he wasn't sure _what_ he wanted anymore. No one seemed to measure up to Dee. No one seemed good enough. No. Dee wasn't good enough either. Dee was never good enough. Dee would not be his high standard.

He sighed, gently, shifting in the pew uncomfortably, staring at the crucifix hanging ominously above the altar. He dropped his gaze to the wedding party, watching his partner fidget in his spot as best man. He looked so strange, dressed in his tuxedo, clean-shaven and tidy, not a hair out of place, but still, best man…it seemed like a good title for him. _Best man._ It also seemed like a death sentence. The male equivalent of "always the bridesmaid never the bride".

JJ knew in his heart that Drake would never get it right. He knew that even if he didn't know it, no one was going to be good enough for him, to give him the love he deserved. He would never find that perfect fit. He smiled to himself, _alone together I guess? I doubt I'll ever find a perfect fit either. _Their likeness amused him. Of course, their situation would be ideal for romance, but, JJ knew he was barking up the wrong tree with that idea. No matter how perfect a plan, no matter how perfect a fit, just the idea of Drake's rejection hurt. Of course, Drake was probably the only one he could consider being good enough. The irony was devastatingly amusing indeed.

And now, at the reception, at a rather posh resort, he'd escaped the festivities for some fresh air, nursing a glass of champagne. He leaned against the stone railing that surrounded the terrace, overlooking the grounds. Small lights edged the path to the gazebo, glowing dimly in the darkness, seeming somewhat ethereal. After another sip of his drink, he decided champagne just didn't taste the same when you weren't happy.

He didn't hear the French doors of the patio open and shut, nor did he hear the soft scuffle of footsteps until they were right behind him. He looked over his shoulder to see his partner smiling.

"Nothing like a wedding to make you feel even worse about being single, huh?" He stated, hopping up to sit on the railing, balancing his beer beside him.

JJ managed a weak smile and leaned back on the railing, looking back at the glowing gazebo. He glanced back to Drake for a moment, taking him in. It hadn't took long for Drake to revert to his normal ways, the bow-tie untied, draped around his neck, the button at the collar popped open, his hair had gone back to falling in his eyes. JJ preferred him this way. Rumpled, as he'd describe it, was a good look for Drake.

"What?" Drake asked, a grin still lurking on his mouth.

JJ shook his head and watched him procure a pack of cigarettes from his jacket pocket. He patted himself down for a lighter and frowned, looking around. He hopped off the ledge and lit his cigarette from a votive candle on one of the patio tables. He returned and stood right next to JJ, their arms touching.

"May I?" He asked, touching the pack resting between them.

Drake gave him a funny look, but nodded. JJ slid a Newport between his lips and felt Drake's hand brush his wrist, leaning in to touch the embers of his to JJ's unlit tip until it glowed, the crackle of tobacco sounding in the quiet.

JJ took a slow inhale, testing the waters. He hadn't smoked since high school. He hadn't smoked since he met Dee. He exhaled slowly, watching the thin stream drift on the gentle breeze.

"So, you okay?" He asked as JJ shrugged. "Are you going to say anything tonight?" He nudged him gently.

"I'm not sure what _to_ say." He said, finally, abandoning his champagne for the rush of the cigarette. The buzz of the nicotine pulsed in his chest, and head. For the first time today he felt _something ._

"That's a start."  
"A start?"

"Sometimes, feeling nothing is better than feeling something. At least you're not feeling bad."

"I wouldn't say I'm feeling good, though, either."  
"Gotta start somewhere."

JJ went quiet again, thinking as he smoked the cigarette nearly to the filter. Everything felt frozen in time. There was no past anymore. There felt like there would be no future. He sighed and flicked the butt into the bushes.

"What if I don't want to start over?"  
"You don't have a choice, now, do you?"

"Nothing seems right anymore." He said, simply as the patio doors opened and they were joined by others out for fresh air and a smoke (_a funny combination_, JJ thought).

The sounds of the festivities spilled outside, and JJ mentally cringed. It wasn't even the fact that it was the sounds of his defeat; it was simply the sounds of happiness that nearly nauseated him. Drake grabbed his hand gently and gave him a leading tug, leading him down the dimly lit path.

"You can't let this eat you alive, JJ." He told him, once they were in the privacy of the gazebo. "I can't say I'm not really bummed about being alone, either, you know?"

"See, that's the thing…I don't think that it's just about Dee anymore. It's, well, everything. I just can't see a future for me." He smiled. "Besides, you have a chance at getting married and having kids…I don't."  


"How do you figure? Canada? Massachusetts? California? New York is even said to be recognizing the California unions. And there's always adoption and surrogates."

"Since when are you the gay rights scholar?"

Drake shrugged. "One of my neighbors down the hall is on vacation so I've been borrowing their newspaper." He smiled as JJ rolled his eyes.

"I just don't think I would make a good…anything. I just don't think that I can ever get what I want, it's been a reoccurring theme for me."  
"There are plenty of fish in the sea, JJ."  
JJ looked up at him and frowned. "So I've heard, from _you_ actually, and we both know how that turned out."  
"How could I forget?" He grinned and sat beside him. "Can't say I wasn't amused…after the shock wore off at least."  
"That was over 2 years ago."

"It was a big shock."

JJ laughed quietly as Drake reached out and _smoothed_, not ruffled his hair. His laughter quickly ceased, as he looked over to his partner, feeling strong fingers sifting through his hair.

"JJ…I…" He cleared his throat nervously. "I don't want to see anymore of this melancholy bullshit."

"Bullshit?" He pulled away slightly but Drake's hand closed around his arm gently.  
"You know what I mean, Jem." He sighed. "I am willing to do _anything_ to make you smile again." He squeezed his arm reassuringly. "What is it you want most from this life?"  
He looked away and swallowed the lump in his throat. "I'm afraid that…that what if what I really wanted was in front of me all along?" _What if I'm afraid that you're what I really want and that you don't feel the same? _

Drake sighed and turned JJ's face towards him, leaning in to gently and hesitantly place a kiss on his lips.

He rested his forehead against JJ's. "I know exactly what you mean. I have a hard time seeing a future, too, you know. In the past five years? I've changed so much and haven't even realized it. I never thought…that…" He laughed softly. "I never saw myself here. But, I'm glad I ended up here…if that makes sense."

JJ blinked and licked his lips nervously, pulling away. "Are you saying…what I think you're saying?"

Drake smiled and shrugged. "Am I? How am I supposed to know what you're thinking? Am I psychic or something?" He laughed as JJ huffed. "You know what I'm saying. There's nothing I'd like more than to face whatever lies ahead _with_ you. So…if you wanna maybe give it a shot, I'm game." He said fidgeting anxiously.

JJ looked down at his feet and thought a moment. He closed his eyes and envisioned Drake as his lover, a small smile crossing over his lips.

"Because…you know…really…" Drake cleared his throat. "If you think about it? We're pretty much already a couple. We work together, we spend all of our free time together, we turn to each other when 

we need help…actually we're pretty much married since there's no sex." They shared a laugh and JJ rested his cheek on Drake's shoulder.

"I'm game, as long as if we get married we break that no-sex habit." He said as Drake nuzzled the top of his head.

"You don't have to worry about that." He told him, wrapping his arm around JJ.

JJ was still leaning on Drake as they walked slowly back up the path, stalling as much as they could before rejoining the festivities. He never was one to be impressed by romantic settings, but the warm spring air, Drake's arm around his waist, the little baubles of light lining the trail certainly had made this moment. The glow of the patio loomed before them like the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel.

"It's very ominous isn't it? Symbolic even."  
JJ looked up at him and stared before laughing quietly. "I was just thinking the same thing." He said as Drake grinned and leaned in easily for another kiss. JJ wrapped his arms around Drake's neck and smiled to himself. Finally, something had gone right. Finally, something he had something he wanted. The glimmer of hope was nestled safely inside of him again, the future was suddenly tangible and looking bright.

"So, maybe I _am_ psychic." Drake said after pulling away, shooting JJ the sleepy smile he loved so much. He dramatically put a hand to his forehead. "I'm having a vision; your childhood puppy is trying to contact me--"

JJ swatted him affectionately. "Dork, I never had a dog." He laughed quietly as Drake took his hand, leading him up the steps.

"Well, good, then I know what to get for your birthday."

"You're not supposed to _tell_ me that." He huffed as Drake waved his hands in a mockingly mystical gesture.

"Oh, but what if I surprise you with a cat, or a rabbit, or a…parrot!"

"Parrots freak me out."

"Good to know." He grinned and kissed him again quickly before opening the patio doors.

-fin-

Woo. Holy crapola. So, as some of you may know, my laptop bit the dust and took my desktop with it. Lol. No is good. Not to mention, on top of that, I've been working way too much, classes are back in session (I was thinking I was excited for classes to start again? WRONG. By the way, I love dumbshits with Doctorates.) So, yay….I broke the seal! I actually wrote 80 percent of this in the college library. It's happy there. I also wrote this listening to a LOT of deathcabforcutie! (The Photo Album specifically.) 

Steadier Footing was the main impetus but…I got a bit off course coz I went with HAPPY not Sad. Yay Happy.

Reviews are always appreciated, though i know this certainly wasn't the best thing I could have produced, but i needed to break the ice ;)

Love love love, best wishes to all.

Xo

Priya Lalita.


	2. Every Story Has Two Sides

**Every Story Has Two Sides**

By: Priya Lalita.

Drake Parker fidgeted at the altar, trying to hide his nervousness. The title of Best Man felt like such a giant responsibility. Really, he was flattered but this really wasn't his deal. But, how do you turn down your best friend for something that momentous? There were others he could have asked, but no. It was _his_ duty. He fought the urge to fiddle with his bowtie. This monkey-suit was intolerable, and he really needed a cigarette. He focused on his good friends, gazing lovingly at each other, that secret smile that lovers share lingering on their lips. He swallowed hard, feeling more uncomfortable than ever. What he wouldn't give to feel that way. What he wouldn't give to be in their shoes, or almost.

More precisely, what he wouldn't give to be standing there, staring into the eyes of the woman of his dreams, sharing their own secret smiles, his family standing by. His mother would cry, his father would be beaming with pride, his brothers would tease him about being _last but not least_ and about his wedding night. Her parents would love him; her father would shake his hand as he handed her over at the altar. His bride would get a little teary, but be smiling as wide as could be. There would be birdseed thrown, not rice, because rice was cruel to the poor birds that tried to eat it. (No, there would be no exploding pigeons or sparrows on _his_ wedding day.) There would be tin-cans and graffiti (care of his brothers and his friends) on their limo. The reception would be casual, yet fancy. Upscale DIY. Everything would be perfect. Their wedding night and honeymoon would be magical, all leading up to a house in the suburbs, a few wonderful kids, and maybe a dog. He was torn between a Border Collie and a Labrador.

He heard the priest announce the kiss and snapped out of his daydream to see the two lock lips. He grinned to himself, _Ryo, what the blushing bride. _And slowly as he watched them, he knew that his own little fantasy would never happen. He scanned the pews for a specific face in a sea of familiar people. Even from under the lights he could see blue eyes and platinum blonde hair shining from the back row. His heart beat a little faster as he smiled softly at his partner. _Those eagle eyes never miss a thing,_ he thought, getting a smile in return, watching those full lips mouth the words _nice suit_. He smirked and followed the photographer's instructions, getting shoved into some group photo.

He groaned internally and smiled out of obligation. He plastered a convincing yet fake smile on his mouth as he thought about his future. That storybook life, that American Dream felt like it would never be his. His past six relationships, in the past year, had been so hollow and phony. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't connect with any of his (now former) girlfriends. Alison, an elementary school teacher couldn't handle his occupation, Diane, a lawyer, was too involved with her occupation, Jennie was too optimistic and bubbly, Liz didn't like his friends, Helena had awful taste in music, and Bernadette was just psychotic.

Nothing felt right with any of them, even sex. He'd never expected sex to become routine and damn near uninteresting. More than once he'd have preferred to have been elsewhere. (The thought chilled him.) Nothing was the way it should be anymore. Nothing felt like it fit. He wondered if thirty-six was old enough to have a midlife crisis. He supposed that if you were still single like him, it was never _too_ early to have one. He wished he weren't perpetually broke-- a shiny convertible just might cure 

him. (It didn't even have to be a BMW, he'd settle for a Ford, or a Mazda, or even a Toyota, as long as it was red.)

But no, he was Drake Parker: thirty-six going on thirty-seven, perpetually single, perpetually broke, and perpetually unlucky, with a piece-of-shit car.

Drake felt like a zombie, trudging through the reception on auto-pilot, smiling on cue, toasting and cheering for the happy couple. It was torture. He'd rather have a root canal without anesthetic. And to make it worse, every time he got near JJ, someone or thing, called him away. All he wanted was five fucking minutes with him. Five minutes to absorb some of that glowing aura, to leech some of that brilliant positivity, to have that sunny smile chase away just a little of his doom and gloom. But, no. Not for him. He settled for a cigarette, eventually, while everyone ate, slipping out the side door. He just needed a break. Some fresh air.

Unfortunately, summers in New York brought anything _but_ fresh air. It was muggy and hot down at the gazebo, but he didn't care. He slipped a Newport from the pack nestled in his jacket pocket and held it between his lips a moment before lighting it, relaxing with the slight tingle of the menthol on his lips. He turned the silver Zippo over in his palm, rubbing his thumb over the etching of a nautical star. JJ had given him the lighter for Christmas last year, with a caveat that it wasn't a sign of his approval of his smoking, just that he should do it in style. Somehow he'd managed to hang onto it all this time, finding it strange since he couldn't hang onto a Bic for more than a few days. It just felt like such a precious item to him, a treasure at the bottom of his pocket. Of course, it could have been the fact that it was JJ who gave it to him.

He was deathly afraid of the timeline of his disinterest in all of his former girlfriends. Ever since _it_ happened, ever since the kiss on the rooftop… It was such a simple thing: a sealing of a deal, a period at the end of a sentence. That's all it was. It was to usher in a new way of doing things. Wait, no. That wasn't right. It was…a sign of independence. That they didn't need anyone else to make them happy. No. Goddamnit, why _had_ they kissed again? Sadly to Drake, what happened before and after was entirely forgotten, not quite caring about the circumstances. It wasn't supposed to mean anything. It didn't, still. But, Drake couldn't help but admit that more than once, when he was with one of his exes, he would have greatly preferred to have been on the couch watching TV with JJ, or out at a bar with him, or… the list went on. He'd become entirely dependent on his partner. In fact, JJ was probably the one thing in his life that he could rely on to not fuck him over, or make him miserable.

He would have loved nothing more than to _love_ JJ, but he couldn't. No. That wasn't part of the plan. That threw a cog in that fantasy, his ultimate goal. His mother would cry (and not the happy kind), his father would swear up and down that he had no son by the name of Drake, the majority of his brothers would be repulsed. JJ's sister would be the only one who flew in (JJ had never been close with 

his mother or step-father and there would be no tears from either of them,) and he was sure that it would be a pitiful affair.

A cold, wet bottle on the back of his neck jerked him out of his thoughts and he lurched forward, dropping his cigarette.

"Fuck!" He hissed, whirling around, rubbing the back of his neck vigorously. All annoyance faded as he focused on the source of his troubles, laughing sweetly.

"Sorry," JJ said, holding the beer out to him as a peace offering.

Drake smiled after a second and took it, twisting off the cap.

"Cheers." He said with ironic cheer_less_ness, sitting back down as JJ took a sip of his own.

JJ straddled the bench and placed his beer in the space between them, hands resting on his thighs. Drake sighed and shook another cigarette out of the pack, slowly dragging his thumb over the wheel of flint, watching the Zippo produce its flame. The lungful of smoke calmed him slightly, calmed further now that JJ was here. He placed the pack by JJ's beer and watched the skinny blonde sitting there, in the remnants of a Versace suit, down to a white dress shirt, with his sleeves rolled up and black fitted slacks and Ferragamo oxfords. JJ reached out and took the pack, pulling out one for himself. He flicked the flint again and lit it for him, listening to the cap of the metal lighter clink as it closed.

"Hypocrite."

"It's been a long day." He said, smiling as he slowly puffed. "It's been a long _year_."

"Tell me about it." He laughed humorlessly.

"This is kind of weird, you know…Everyone's starting to settle down. Berkley and Diana are engaged, Dee and Ryo…"  
"Ted's still single."  
"Do you really ever see Ted settling down? I see him hopping from one hot piece of ass to the other till he dies."  
"Maybe. I guess you're right. I can only see him settling down if he got some girl knocked up."  
"True, true." JJ exhaled a breath of smoke, watching it drift across the lake.

"What a fucking year."  
"Yep. It's been a trip. Mmm, you found some sure winners this year…Bernadette, she was totally mental, and Diane who would literally _schedule_ your sex life." He smirked as Drake snorted, sipping on his beer.

"Well what about Kevin? Who wanted you to suck him off on the first date? Or Reggie who invited you over for dinner with his _wife_?"  
JJ groaned and shook his head. "Seriously. What is wrong with people today?"  
"I don't know…What if it's us?" He squirmed in his seat and took another sip of his beer. JJ let out a little sigh and Drake felt him tug at his jacket.

"You know you can relax after the church, you know." He said, as Drake allowed him to assist in getting his suit jacket off, dropping the spent cigarette and crushing it under his shoe. "No wonder you look so miserable, it's hot as hell out here and you're still in your monkey suit."He mused, cigarette pinched in the corner of his lips. He let JJ unbutton the cuffs of his sleeves and roll them up before getting up and undoing his bowtie. It felt good to be fussed over, he decided, as JJ tucked his untied bowtie in the jacket pocket, after flicking away the butt.

"There." He said, as Drake leaned forward and rested his cheek against JJ's stomach.

"Is today over yet?"  
"No." He said, taking this tender moment to fix his slicked back hair.

Drake sighed gently as those slender hands moved to his shoulders, kneading gently. Why? Why couldn't this be right? Why couldn't he just spend all his time with JJ, and live happily ever after? Drake had never been the one to take the easy way out, but the path ahead looked far too daunting. The fear of losing his family, along with his chance at creating one was far too much to bear. But he ached for his touch. Was it really too much to ask that your gay best friend get a little frisky with you? For those hands to innocently slip underneath the collar of his shirt, down his shoulders to his chest, for him to lean in to get a better angle—He snapped out of it quickly and pulled away, trying to not look _too _ uncomfortable. Daydreaming was dangerous, especially when they were hidden away in the gazebo, the air hot and thick with the scent of jasmine from the gardens, mingling with hints of JJ's cologne. He swallowed the lump in his throat and felt JJ sit beside him again. He leaned against him a little to let him know it was okay and sighed. Love was supposed to be happy, not a disaster. Love was supposed to bring people together, not tear them apart.

"Are you okay?" JJ asked quietly, as Drake shook his head.

"No."  
"What can I do to help you?" He asked, those gorgeous, huge blue eyes searching his face.

He laughed quietly, shaking his head. _Go back in time and give yourself another X chromosome,_ He thought, as he shook his head again.

"Nothing." He said as JJ rested his head against his.

"Are you bummed out because of being single?" He asked as Drake sighed. Even if it weren't obvious, JJ knew him too well.

"I give up. For real this time."  
"Fine. Then it's you and me, then. Two against the world." He said simply as Drake snorted.

"Did you steal that from Grindhouse?" He teased, remembering their latest movie night.

"So, they stole it first. They did _not_ invent the phrase." He retorted smartly, with a smile.

God, how he'd love to have it just be them against the world. Just pick up everything, and start fresh. Start new. Find a place where love wasn't a catalyst for war. He supposed he could always focus on 

the good things. JJ would most undoubtedly get misty during the ceremony, but have the sunniest of smiles on his face. And he supposed that they could live without the tin-cans and decorations on the limo if no one thought to do it. And he had no doubt that the reception would be fine, and he could just _imagine_ their wedding night and honeymoon. He supposed they could forgo the house in the suburbs and just move into a larger apartment. In lieu of the big house, he guessed that a small dog would be fine, and adoption was a dim hope.  
And JJ would most certainly agree to bird-seed instead of rice, JJ would _never_ stand for exploding birds on their wedding day, or, ever in fact.

He swallowed the lump in the back of his throat and took a deep breath. He turned his head, until he was looking into JJ's eyes, then staring at those parted lips. Waiting. His pulse raced as he fought the gravitation-like pull he felt towards him. Soft voices, engaged in their own conversation snapped him out of his haze. He pulled away and stood, clearing his throat.

"We should get back." He said simply, grabbing the suit jacket. JJ nodded, hiding his distress well, but not well enough from Drake.

Regardless, Drake knew he couldn't drag JJ down with him in his suffering. He wouldn't put him through the hatred his family would show them. He wouldn't do anything to hurt him. Less people would be upset this way. It was for the best, he told himself. He wouldn't shame his family. He couldn't.

He watched JJ stand, forcing a small smile.

"I'm sorry." He said as JJ looked a bit puzzled.

"Why?"  
He shrugged, unable to say it. The moment hung in the air like a blinking cursor in word processor. Everything had stopped, except for the warm breeze and the crickets. He turned away and started towards the resort, his jacket thrown over his arm with JJ following quietly. As he approached the lit patio he paused.

"I'm going to throw this in the room." He gestured for JJ to follow and headed in and up the stairs, managing to keep out of sight. He pulled the cardkey out of his pants pocket and slid it through the lock on the door, inviting JJ in.

The quiet was deafening as they stepped inside. Drake threw his tuxedo jacket on the bed and sighed. JJ stood in the middle of the room, waiting while Drake stepped into the small bathroom. He bent over the sink, letting the cool water run before splashing some on his face. The cold felt good and he could feel droplets snaking down his neck and chest. He looked into the mirror and watched JJ over his shoulder, staring at the carpet. He gripped the porcelain of the sink and hung his head again. Fighting temptation was the hardest part of all this. He took a deep breath and stood tall, grabbing a hand towel on the way out to dry his face.

"Ready?" JJ asked with a soft smile as he stood before him, dabbing his face with the white terrycloth. He froze, finding himself drowning in those deep blue eyes again, his pulse beating frantically as if he were a small animal stuck in a trap. Just one kiss, one kiss and they'd be even. He leaned in, his hand 

cupping JJ's cheek and kissed him softly on the lips. He'd fully intended on a hasty retreat, but instead wrapped his other arm around JJ's waist pulling him against his chest. He could feel JJ's hands pinned between them gripping his shirt as he deepened the kiss. A quiet gasp came from his partner as Drake pushed him onto the bed, straddling his thighs. He tried to stop himself, eventually managing to tear himself away.

"Fuck!" He shouted, rushing off the bed like it was on fire. He panted and cursed, moving to the opposite side of the room. He couldn't bear to look at JJ, who wasn't trying to hide his hurt at all this time, a look of panic on his face.

"I'm sorry." JJ choked out, getting up as Drake shook his head vehemently.

"Don't touch me, _please_." He begged, as JJ stopped before him, biting on his lower lip. "Please. _Fuck_. Why?" He let his head tilt back and hit the wall, finally looking at his partner. "Why do you feel so good?" He asked as JJ's lips parted slightly, his hand hovering, hesitating before he touched his hand.

"I can't answer that for you." He said, honestly, as Drake pulled away and sat on the bed, holding his head in his hands, tugging at his hair.

"Why? I'm trying so damn hard—" He let out a frustrated sigh. "I just want…All I've ever wanted was a normal life. I wanted to get married, make everyone happy, I wanted everything to be perfect."  
"Since when is marriage perfect?" JJ asked, as Drake stared at him.

"It would have been."  
"You can think that if you want, but every relationship has its issues. Dee and Ryo took how long to get here? You think it's going to be a storybook tale for them? Marriage is a commitment of loving someone no matter _what_ happens. To have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part." He said, reciting the token wedding vows. He reached out and smoothed Drake's hair and covered his hand with his own. "Drake, I'm not trying to tell you what's right and wrong, but, chances are if it makes you happy, it's a good thing."  
"We would tear my family apart." Drake whispered, leaning into his touch instinctively.

"They'd live." He smiled and wrapped his arms around Drake's shoulders.

"My parents already hate you, we both know that."  
"They're just worried about you. They care about you. My parents couldn't care less, so consider yourself lucky." He made Drake look at him and smiled. "I promise I'm not pressuring you, whatever you decide is fine with me. You know I care about you more than anything, you're my _best_ friend, my partner…you mean everything to me, and you know the last thing I want to do is cause trouble for you." He gave Drake a teeny Eskimo kiss, laughing gently.

Drake took a deep breath after a few minutes of silence and contemplation, and pushed JJ back on the bed, hovering over him with a slow smile.

"Fuck it." He said, kissing him again. "I just don't fucking care." He added, breaking away for air. "I'm just not going to be happy if I'm not with you." JJ beamed up at him and wrapped his arms around his neck.

Drake felt all his tension melt away, replaced by jittery excitement as they kissed, allowing himself to explore JJ the way he'd only fantasized about before. A low groan escaped him as JJ's teeth worked at the button of his fly. He tugged roughly on a beltloop of JJ's suit pants, getting a cry of protest.

"Hey! Watch it, unless you're buying me a new pair." He huffed, hopping off the bed, inspecting his pants for damage.

"Well, mine's a rental." Drake retorted, propping himself up on his elbows as JJ rolled his eyes, slipping off his shoes.

"Well, mine's _Versace!_" He shot back as Drake slowly laughed, unable to stop the smile from spreading across his face.

"God, I love you." He said as JJ grinned, slowly undoing his belt as Drake took the hint, shimmying out of what was left of his tux, kicking off his shoes.

"I love you too." He purred, letting the pants drop before crawling back onto the bed.

Drake nestled his face in JJ's neck, basking in the afterglow, letting his hands wander to explore the heat of his lover's body. They both froze at the sound of a knock on the door.

"Drake! You in there?! Dude, what the fuck!"

"Ted." He groaned as JJ hopped out of bed, collecting clothing as he went. Drake got himself halfway decent and JJ ducked into the bathroom. They could both agree that now was probably not the best time to let everyone know.

"What?" He huffed, answering the door, as Ted grinned.

"Dude! Where have you--whoa, look at that hickey!" He exclaimed as Drake clapped a hand over his neck, feeling his face grow hot with embarrassment.

"What?"

"Well, I was gonna ask where you disappeared to, but…who was it? Damn, was it that brunette? The bridesmaid? She was fucking _hot_."  
"No. Someone from traffic. Nancy?" He shrugged, picking a name at random.

"Isn't Nancy married, Drake you homewrecker—"

"Not Nancy. Uh, Dana. Sorry."  
"Well, they need you for something…another toast or something. I forget."

"Alright, coming." He said, shutting the door, stopping as Ted's foot pried in.

"She still in there? I don't remember a Dana. Is she hot?"

"Ted." He said in warning as Ted put up his hands innocently, and removed his foot.

He shut the door and leaned back against it and watched JJ emerge from the bathroom fully dressed.

"That was _smooth_." JJ said, grinning as Drake frowned.

"I'm a bad liar, okay?" He headed back to the bed and redressed himself sullenly. "And why do they need me to do all the toasting?"

"Because you're the Best Man, and you are a fantastic Best Man."  
"But I don't wanna go." He sighed, as JJ laughed.

"You have to." He said as Drake grumbled. He reached out and smoothed Drake's hair, feeling Drake's arms wrap around his waist. "There's only an hour or so left, anyway." He received a petulant grunt in reply. "What do you say if I stay the night? Will that cheer you up?"  
Drake looked up at him and grinned.

Drake poked his head out of the room and scanned the hallway, deciding the coast was clear and opened the door all the way. The second they stepped out Ted rounded the corner.

"Oh, by the way—Holy shit." He stopped and stared at the two of them. "Where's Dana?" He asked, looking around as the two looked at each other and laughed.

Ted had a helplessly confused and traumatized look on his face for a moment, then smiled. "So…no chick in there…?" He asked as JJ laughed louder.

Drake swung his arm around JJ's shoulders and lead them past Ted, who was smiling, giving him an affectionate shove.

"It's about time, you know." He said as they passed. "But, seriously? Is there a Dana in traffic? Hot? Not? Come on! Point me in the right direction, someone here has to procreate!" He exclaimed, following them down the hall.

-Fin-

So, I got inspired again. This is a bit more how I expected it to turn out. Or at least til I got to the part where I got "stuck". (Guess where…it's a direct simile to writer's block lol) And again I went for the happy, but not before laying the angst on thick. I'm considering a third part. Don't hold your breath, but, it's a maybe ;)

So, Playlist?  
Death Cab For Cutie- Steadier Footing (as mentioned before).

The Smiths- The Queen is Dead and Strange Days Here We Come

Morrissey- Viva Hate, Bona Drag, Kill Uncle, and Your Arsenal.

(can anyone see a trend?)

And last but not least?

Okkervil River- Black Sheep Boy, The Stage Names, The Stand Ins. (The Stand Ins is being previewed on myspace right now…and It really makes me wish I weren't Broke because, dear god, I want that cd and the posters…) (Specific songs: The Latest Toughs, and, Blue Tulip.)

Best wishes to you all,

xo

PriyaLalita


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